Paige Liber

I am a Hodgkins Lymphoma Stage 2 survivor

I am a Hodgkins Lymphoma Stage 2 survivor - diagnosed December 2nd, 2016

The biggest challenge in my blood cancer experience was navigating the early stages of remission - you hear the words "no evidence detected" and it’s a mixture of feelings; you want to celebrate but you also know there’s still a long journey ahead of you to heal in all aspects. The challenge was trying to change my mindset to be more positive after treatment.  During my battle, I kept my head down and tried to stay positive, but once it was over, I just felt empty and alone - there was no longer an end game.  When there was the goal of beating cancer, I knew it was going to get better at some point.  But when you are in remission, you are out on your own trying to figure it all out and no one can prepare you for that. There was all this built-up emotion that I hadn't dealt with during treatment.  I didn't feel like the person I was before I had cancer; I felt like I didn't have my own identity after.  I really struggled for 6 - 7 months after completing treatment, and I can still sink back into negative thoughts when I am coming up to check-up appointments.  But I found myself again by self-love: working out, getting back to work, focusing on the relationships in my life that truly mattered.

How has my life been changed by a blood cancer - 2 really big things.
First of all, my mindset - I try to be a lot more positive in my outlook on life.  I struggled with anxiety even before cancer; I could let it consume me.  Now, I take a step back and remember, "I've been through worse; this will pass, too!"  Now I want to stop and smell the roses more.  Secondly, I am so much more empathetic towards my patients (I work as an LPN); I stop to provide that emotional support for my patients.  I take the step to share my story to make them feel better in a time when they are not feeling too great.

I was inspired to join Light The Night because I wanted a sense of belonging and to be surrounded by people who understood what I was going through.  Prior to Light the Night, the only communication I had had with other survivors was through social media.  I had never physically been in person with others who were going through what I had gone through, so I was looking to find that support.  A lot of people receiving treatments at the Cross Cancer Institute were seniors, so I was also seeking to find support from people in my own age group.  I also wanted to walk in support of my Nana, who had Hodgkins Lymphoma in her 30s (she has also had breast cancer twice); she has survived!

Light The Night is a really great way to celebrate with my family; my parents and my sister were my rocks during my treatment.  I can also say "thank you" to them for helping me get through it.  My sister had to put a lot of her teen years on the back burner because she needed to help me.  Cancer is now a far memory; Light the Night is a reminder of how far I've come and how hard I've worked to get to where I am today.  It's also a way to say "thank you" to the Cross Cancer Institute and The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society of Canada.

Blood cancers (leukemia & lymphoma) can affect almost everyone in families.  It is a hard cancer - you can't just have surgery and it's over.  The treatment (chemotherapy, radiation) can be extensive and aggressive.  Light the Night is a really amazing experience; this walk is different - it is an event focused on creating a bright and eye-opening experience.  There are a lot of different activities, too.  It's hard to explain if you haven't been there, but it really is a heartwarming experience to be there.  It's insane the amount of young people attend - I don’t think there is a lot of awareness for how to check for these diseases, so this event is educational, too.